Last night i went out for a makan with 2 neighbours and i wondered what makes good neighbours. I remember growing up in Damansara Utama and the kids in the neighbourhood would gather every 5pm to play in the park. We were play pals for a long time. Sure, we had our arguments, plenty of which we would end up saying " i dont want to friend you." (good grammar aside). But eventually we would get back and play together. So i guess, there was an objective in our bonding together.....PLAY.
And setting aside our differences was much easier because the urgency to play was more important than our pride lest if staying at home and being bored out of our pants was more exciting.
Funnily, the balance of scale tips to holding on to our pride as we get older. Our pride becomes more precious. " So what " we would say, "it is just another friend. We can make more new friends...."
Now that we are adults, we would rationalise things and say lets work it out. So in the context of being neighbours, would this make you a good neighbour when you try to work things out after a disagreement or a dissatisfaction. Or are we not so good neighbour for the mere fact that we do not agree on doing things a certain way or another?
Are we good neighbours when we give unsolicited advice to other neighours on how to run their household better or we are the good neighbours for not rebuffing the neighbour giving the unsolicited advice?
Are we the good neighbour when we proceed to do physical things for our neighbour when they call for our help or are we not such a good neighbour if we were the ones calling on the neighbours for help ever so often.
Are we better if we were to help our neighbour scoop the dog poop from his frontyard. Are we good neighbour when we dont throw our cigarette butt in our neighbours side of the fence/house (no offence to dog owners or smokers intended). Are we good neighbours if were were to pick up the garbage left by our contractor on our neighbours side?
Does your neighbour's gift of souvenirs from holidays to you mean you are a good neighbour? Does cooking for your neighbour mean you are a good neighbour?
What makes us good neighbours? i guess its the perennial principle of life " Mutual respect and understanding". These are things that cannot be seen or touched. These are things that are felt by the heart. Some will take a longer time to feel it, others will take almost immediately to warm up to you and like you as a neighbour.
I personally think getting to know the neighbours' character and personality is finding how you can treat your neighbour. Mutual respect and understanding towards them eases you into liking them. So liking your neighbour makes you a good neighbour eventually. If you dont like your neighbour, no matter what they do, it will always seem wrong. It starts when you start finding fault or getting angry with your neighbour and it will consume you and finally you just dont like your neighbour. AND that is the start of you definitely not being a good neighbour.
I had the opportunity to start with not liking my neighbour whose house is like a "belukar" in its garden. And i hated the mosquitoes that bred from there and there was even a cobra that came into my backyard from his house to which he denied vehemently. Sometimes in the middle of the night, he would pound away scraps in his backyard. He avoided everyone and never gave even a glance to any neighbours.
But over the years, and through some communication, knowing his personality made me see how to treat him. Today, if he drives by in this car and if he sees me, he would wave to me.
and today, to all those neighbours around SS22A, who take their morning walks route passing by my house and smilling to me, and for all the neighbours who would greet me and talk to me, i say thank you.
I like my neighbours and hopefully, they like me too. And just as when i was a little girl, i have neighbours that band together for a common objective, to make the community a better place.
And setting aside our differences was much easier because the urgency to play was more important than our pride lest if staying at home and being bored out of our pants was more exciting.
Funnily, the balance of scale tips to holding on to our pride as we get older. Our pride becomes more precious. " So what " we would say, "it is just another friend. We can make more new friends...."
Now that we are adults, we would rationalise things and say lets work it out. So in the context of being neighbours, would this make you a good neighbour when you try to work things out after a disagreement or a dissatisfaction. Or are we not so good neighbour for the mere fact that we do not agree on doing things a certain way or another?
Are we good neighbours when we give unsolicited advice to other neighours on how to run their household better or we are the good neighbours for not rebuffing the neighbour giving the unsolicited advice?
Are we the good neighbour when we proceed to do physical things for our neighbour when they call for our help or are we not such a good neighbour if we were the ones calling on the neighbours for help ever so often.
Are we better if we were to help our neighbour scoop the dog poop from his frontyard. Are we good neighbour when we dont throw our cigarette butt in our neighbours side of the fence/house (no offence to dog owners or smokers intended). Are we good neighbours if were were to pick up the garbage left by our contractor on our neighbours side?
Does your neighbour's gift of souvenirs from holidays to you mean you are a good neighbour? Does cooking for your neighbour mean you are a good neighbour?
What makes us good neighbours? i guess its the perennial principle of life " Mutual respect and understanding". These are things that cannot be seen or touched. These are things that are felt by the heart. Some will take a longer time to feel it, others will take almost immediately to warm up to you and like you as a neighbour.
I personally think getting to know the neighbours' character and personality is finding how you can treat your neighbour. Mutual respect and understanding towards them eases you into liking them. So liking your neighbour makes you a good neighbour eventually. If you dont like your neighbour, no matter what they do, it will always seem wrong. It starts when you start finding fault or getting angry with your neighbour and it will consume you and finally you just dont like your neighbour. AND that is the start of you definitely not being a good neighbour.
I had the opportunity to start with not liking my neighbour whose house is like a "belukar" in its garden. And i hated the mosquitoes that bred from there and there was even a cobra that came into my backyard from his house to which he denied vehemently. Sometimes in the middle of the night, he would pound away scraps in his backyard. He avoided everyone and never gave even a glance to any neighbours.
But over the years, and through some communication, knowing his personality made me see how to treat him. Today, if he drives by in this car and if he sees me, he would wave to me.
and today, to all those neighbours around SS22A, who take their morning walks route passing by my house and smilling to me, and for all the neighbours who would greet me and talk to me, i say thank you.
I like my neighbours and hopefully, they like me too. And just as when i was a little girl, i have neighbours that band together for a common objective, to make the community a better place.
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